A lot of law firm owners find themselves emotionally reacting to situations in their firm. Now, because you’re here as part of Entrepreneurial Attorney (EA) Nation, and because you’ve chosen to be a student of your business, this likely happens to you less than it does for many other law firm owners. That’s a real advantage and a great opportunity to recognize. But even so, it still happens.
I know that because it happens to me too. We’re all human. So let me share with you a framework I presented recently at Partners Club: the difference between creating your future and simply managing your future.
The framework we discussed is called above the line vs. below the line.
Think of a line running through your leadership. That line represents fear.
When you operate above the line, you lead by:
- Coaching
- Creating
- Challenging
When you operate below the line, fear kicks in and you fall into one of three roles:
- The victim
- The villain
- The hero
This idea was popularized years ago by Robert Kiyosaki in Rich Dad Poor Dad and has been used by leadership coaches and management consultants (Brené Brown, Stephen Covey, Jim Dethmer, and more) ever since.
But where it becomes especially powerful is inside the leadership of a law firm.
So how do you respond when the tough decisions show up? Let me illustrate this for you.
Let’s say someone quits on your team.
That’s below the line.
Above the line looks different.
Above the line leadership is about building better systems, not reacting emotionally.
When Staff Make Mistakes
Let’s go to the management stage.
A paralegal walks into your office and says, “Boss, I just made a mistake. I sent a confidential document to opposing counsel.”
Below the line response:
“What is wrong with you? Haven’t I told you this a thousand times? Do you know how bad this makes us look?”
Above the line response might look like this:
“Sally, I’m going to need a minute because that triggered an emotional reaction for me. Can we come back in 15 minutes and talk about this?”
Fifteen minutes later:
“Sally, we both know this is serious. Let’s unpack it. First, we need a plan to address the situation. Second, we need to build a process so it doesn’t happen again. I’d like you to propose a solution.”
Is that perfect leadership? No. But it’s a framework that builds ownership instead of fear.
Why Lawyers Often Slip Below the Line
Many attorneys today are operating under enormous pressure. They’re working 15-hour days. They’re exhausted. They’re sleeping poorly. They’re running on caffeine. They’ve stopped exercising. Life is out of balance.
When you’re in that state, emotional reactions become easier.
Around here we sometimes joke about “going all attorney” on someone.
I’ve worked with lawyers for nearly two decades now, and most of them are excellent leaders.
But occasionally someone forgets their microphone is unmuted during a meeting and suddenly I hear them explode at a team member.
They shame someone. They blame someone. Or they say, “I’m sick of incompetent staff. I’ll just do it myself.”
That’s below the line.
Just as a reminder, here are the seven stages where you should pay attention to these things bubbling up for you:
- Deciding
- Recruiting
- Onboarding
- Training
- Managing
- Leading
- Scaling
If you’re a Partners Club member be sure to get this traning here:
My Own Leadership Journey
Let me be very clear about something… I’m not teaching this because I’ve mastered it.
Far from it. I’ve made almost every mistake in the book.
I grew up in Scranton, Pennsylvania on the west side of town, where the expectation was often to fight your way out of problems.
I carried that mindset into business.
I yelled. I cursed. I lost my temper with my team.
Sometimes those arguments happened right in front of everyone in the office.
Including my E.C.I.B (East Coast Italian Bride), Maria.
At the time, I justified it.
Some of the books we read in business told us this was strong leadership. Some mentors modeled it. But looking back, those companies operated out of fear.
Today, the companies I run operate differently.
Do I still slip below the line sometimes? Of course.
About 17 minutes before recording this message I saw something that triggered me and I immediately went a little villain on someone.
But I catch it faster now. And that makes all the difference.
It Affects More Than Business
My E.C.I.B and I have been together for 38 years. No marriage lasts that long without challenges.
When I look back honestly, many of our conflicts started because I went below the line.
Victim. Villain. Hero.
Sometimes I even tried to disguise manipulation as coaching. That, too, is below the line.
One of my goals this year is simply to be less angry. That single goal has changed how I show up.
Why This Matters for Your Firm
Until someone invents fully autonomous robot employees (and if you’re waiting for that, please don’t hold your breath) your law firm will always depend on humans.
That means leadership matters.
You must find the right people, filter out the wrong people, and demonstrate how leadership works.
If you constantly operate below the line, you make your job harder than it needs to be. You slow down your own growth. Eventually, you become your own worst enemy.
I’m turning 56 this year. And only in the last few years can I honestly say I feel peaceful about my business.
Not because of money. But because I love what I do, and I love the people I work with.
That culture didn’t happen by accident. It happened because I started working hard to lead above the line, and my team began to do the same.
Leadership is contagious. So is fear.
If you're trying to keep it small, keep it all and maximize profitability…
If you want to break out of the $1.2M to $3M grind…
If you want to truly operate as the CEO of your firm…
Then you must learn to lead above the line.
Because the more often you operate below the line, the longer it will take to reach your goals.
So the next time something goes wrong in your firm, pause and ask yourself one question:
Am I above the line… or below it?
Then choose to lead above the line.
